Kennedy Slept eh... Fell Here!!?
Sleeping in the same room as John F Kennedy did back in 1960, Cousin Jim ended up sprawled face down in the back alley. (I know it is nothing new for a Kennedy, but Cousin Jim H?, staunch Republican?) 3:00 a.m. in the mud and the blood and the beer of the back alley at The Villa Sports Bar in  Carroll, Iowa. Unbelievable.

It seems Florida Jim was home for his 50th class reunion. (Class President) There was MUCH celebrating, maybe a little too much? Friday night, Jim was seen bellying up at The Villa when JJ and Jerilyn walked in. Talking loud, flirting with bar maids, having a loud and obnoxious time. Looking for a card game so he could practice up vs The Tryons. Then Saturday night it was a class barbeque/kegger? Great fun, well at about 3:00 a.m. Sunday,  JH was seen lying on his face in the back alley garbage of The Villa..... Mugged? homeless? nope, he says? he was going to move his car........ ah, right. He waited? until the bar closed, then went outside and missed a step and fell on the ground. No damage he says, but this reporter has discovered actual police photos taken from the scene. I know this reminds one of Chappaquitic (sp?) and the storie seems about as plausible as what Ted Kennedy said. (Hmmmm, is there a resemblence?).

Jim could not golf the next day. He doctored himself (to keep it quiet?, and out of the newspapers) and waited a few days before going back home. Witnesses that night said they heard thumping in the hall way, (OJ witnesses?) a little cussing, then a sleep walker (semi-nude) stumbling, bumbling and mumbling past, looking for his "hot wheels" and growling like a Shelby county cougar. Jim was found in the gutter by a smelly, homeless man named Sneezy who offered Jim a sip of his brown bag Ripple wine. Some neighbors testified they woke to the tune of How Dry I Am, with Jim on the harmony, but that has not been verified. Anyway, this was all suppose to kept away from Tryon News, but nothing gets by the News Hounds in this family. Jim is doing better and The Villa is sure glad this only happens once every fifty years. Anyone spell law suit? Special thanks to the Carroll Police Department for photos.